Family life in Germany

One of the quiet gifts of having a baby in Germany is that your midwife (Hebamme) does not disappear after the birth. Postnatal midwife care (Wochenbettbetreuung) is part of your care and is covered by your insurance, with home visits in the early days and weeks, and further appointments available through the first months for feeding and any worries.

Your midwife weighs and checks your baby, watches how feeding is going, looks after your own healing, and is often the calmest, most practical voice you will have in those first foggy weeks. If you did not arrange a postnatal midwife before the birth, it is still worth asking: search Ammely or your regional Hebammenzentrale, and ask at your birth place.

For the shape of these first six weeks, our guide to the Wochenbett walks through the rest and recovery this season is really for.

Your body has done something enormous, and it deserves real care as it knits itself back together. Two things are worth knowing:

• A postnatal recovery course (Rückbildungskurs) is covered by your insurance and usually begins a couple of months after birth, once your body is ready. It gently rebuilds the deep core and pelvic floor, and many courses are a soft first place to meet other mothers with babies the same age.
• Some women find bodywork helps in the first year, for themselves or their baby. Osteopathy (Osteopathie) is offered by many practitioners here, and a number of statutory insurers contribute to a few sessions a year. Ask your Krankenkasse what they cover, and look for a practitioner experienced with mothers and babies.

There is no prize for rushing any of this. Move at the pace your body sets, and let the people around you carry what they can.

Germany loves a form, and a new baby brings a small flurry of them. The good news is that they follow a sensible order, and many hospitals start the first step for you. In short:

• Register the birth at the registry office (Standesamt) to get the birth certificate (Geburtsurkunde). This is the document everything else needs, and many hospitals forward the paperwork for you.
• Your baby gets a tax ID (Steuer-ID) by post, and is added to your health insurance.
• Child benefit (Kindergeld) and parental allowance (Elterngeld) are each claimed with their own application, and Elterngeld in particular rewards applying early.

For the full walk-through, with who to contact and in what order, our baby paperwork guide lays it all out. And the government's Family Portal has it in English, including a benefits checker for what your family can claim.

However you feed your baby, it can take time to find your rhythm, and you do not have to work it out alone. Support here is good once you know where to look:

• Your midwife supports feeding as part of postnatal care, and can be your first call when something hurts or feels stuck.
• For trickier questions, a qualified lactation consultant (Stillberaterin, often IBCLC) offers dedicated help, sometimes at home.
• Many birth houses (Geburtshäuser) and family centres run drop-in breastfeeding groups (Stillgruppen): warm, low-key mornings where you feed alongside others and ask whatever you need. La Leche Liga also has groups and a helpline.

Whatever feeding looks like for you, a fed baby and a cared-for mother are the whole goal. Be wary of anyone who makes you feel otherwise.

Some crying is part of every baby, and it can still be one of the hardest things to cope with, especially far from the family who might otherwise hold the baby while you breathe. You are not doing it wrong, and you are allowed to find it hard.

If the crying feels relentless, or feeding and sleep have become a real worry, Germany has no-cost clinics for exactly this. A crying clinic (Schreiambulanz) offers calm, practical help with crying, sleep, and feeding in the early months. The national directory at elternsein.info will find one near you.

Alongside this, your baby's regular check-ups (the U-Untersuchungen) keep a gentle eye on how they are growing. Our guide to the well-baby checks explains what each one involves.

Raising a baby far from home can be lonely in a way few people warn you about. The single thing that helps most is other mothers, in the same season, close enough to meet. They are easier to find here than it first seems:

• Your Rückbildung course and the breastfeeding groups above are often where the first friendships start.
• Parent-and-baby groups (PEKiP, Eltern-Kind-Gruppen) at family centres and birth houses gather babies of a similar age week by week.
• For doing this in English, networks like Afloat connect international parents across Germany, with peer groups and a postpartum warmline.

And if you would like company closer to home, the Birth & Mother Club and our community gather English-speaking mothers walking these same months.